My Photo

I'm just saying...

  • Evite should run reviews and ratings from party guests.
  • Prius drivers are the worst.
  • Someday I'd like to have a washing machine that's not at knee-level.
  • Train travel is better in the abstract.
  • Artists should have websites indicating where their works are on display, the way musicians' websites list upcoming shows.
  • Why is stand-up comedy in movies always so terrible?
  • Nothing kills the vibe at a restaurant bar like a laptop.
  • Is a "knowledge base" ever useful?
  • Houseguests are like newborns: Great pains should be taken to keep them asleep.
  • Sometimes I think everyone I know is on the spectrum.
  • Best to avoid any gas pump that also offers diesel.
  • Skip the exit interview.
  • When did car windshields get impossible to clean on the inside?
  • Cookbooks should be very clear about which recipe is featured on the cover.
  • Penne is the saddest pasta.
  • Don't eat a dish named after a volcano.
  • Nobody cares about your app.
  • It's time to remove that note at the end of your emails asking people not to print them.
  • If you think about it, gum is weird.
  • Business idea: TV channel devoted to terror attacks.
  • Please don't tell me about your favorite TV show.
  • The more reachable I've become, the less likely I am to answer my phone.

previous lyrics

  • I never wanted to be your weekend lover
  • Sometimes I wish for a mistake
  • Downstairs the party is going full swing. The people we came with haven't noticed a thing
  • It’s not safe to go out, it’s not right to stay home. Listen, my advice is to carry a gun
  • And anyways I'd rather listen to Coltrane than go through all that shit again
  • Up to Lexington, 125—feel sick and dirty, more dead than alive
  • Whoever brought me here is gonna have to take me home
  • I hear you knockin', but there ain't nobody home
  • What's practical? What's logical? What the hell, who cares?
  • I don't know what I knew before, but now I know I want to win the war
  • Tell me something that you mean, not just what comes to mind
  • I don't know my future after this weekend, and I don't want to
  • I see you driving sports cars, ain't hitting the throttle, and I'll be down to do a hundred, top down and goggles
  • Sing me another love song, but this time with a little dedication
  • You got a look in your eye when you're saying goodbye, like you want to say hi
  • I'll settle for a cup of coffee, but you know what I really need

Categories

Archives

More...

« House of the Blacksmith | Main | Greetings from Stockholm »

07 June 2019

And the Winner Is...

Remember that bug that terrified me—and vice versa—every time I opened our mailbox? It now lives somewhere in Adam's car, because he grabbed the mail without looking at it first.

······················

In other insect news, I spotted this beauty today. It was about twice the size of what you see below and not at all skittish about my presence.

Butterfly in Montecito
······················

And in other wildlife news, just down the road from our driveway, Adam and I spotted what was either a husky coyote or a wolf. Sorry, no photo.

······················

Our friends Tracy and Evan were concerned about where they stood in the totally imaginary houseguest standings, so I had a trophy made. Before you pay, the company insists you check a box confirming that the spelling is correct.

Trophy
Trophy2
Me: The misspelling makes it more valuable.

Evan: It was already invaluable.

······················

Why is stand-up comedy always so terrible in movies? I'm thinking of The Big Sick and Problem Child, in particular, and it casts a shadow over Late Night, which otherwise looks like something I might enjoy.